Old Wooden Head

Outside in the garden

Just to the left of the shed

Sits and old sage

With a wooden head

He never moves a muscle

To help to cut the grass

Or do any weeding

Just sits as bold as brass

However, what happens after dark

When we are all in bed

Would make you blush with shame

Just make your face go red

He comes alive at midnight

Around the garden he goes without fail

Upsetting the lovely mermaid

By treading on her tail

As she splashes around in the water fountain

Nude as nude can be

The poor old Gnome sat in the corner

Covers his eyes so he cannot see

But poor old woody just gets excited

And wants to dance as well

But the mermaid has to point out

If he gets wet then his limbs will swell

Then he will rot way and die

Therefore, he just has to stand and stare

With a loving teardrop in his eye

Because he loves the Mermaid

Who is so sweet and fair  

Has done all his life it seems

However, she does not seem to care

If he had his way tomorrow

He would make her his darling wife

But sadly, morning soon comes around

And they go back to their normal life

So as you walk around the garden 

Please don’t let on you know

Because no one would believe you

So it is best to let it go